I totally forgot about an audition I had in January...
In about the middle of the month, I went to the city to audition to be a storyteller for Historic Philadelphia. They are the group that hires the street performers, costumed characters, and polo-shirted storytellers to entertain visitors who come to Philadelphia over the summer. Some people dress in period wardrobe from the 1700s and play historical people - Betsy Ross, George Washington, random soldiers - and others sit themselves down at pre-approved and advertised benches around the city, telling stories from history and answering any questions that the people have about the city.
Friends of mine have done this storyteller gig in the past, so I went into the audition armed with a 3-minute story about a small historical detail that often gets overlooked. The story I told was one of my favorite pieces from a show I did called "Eureka: Inventors and Their Inventions" that featured a dozen tales of inventors throughout recent history. In fact, I used the same story when I was interviewing for a permanent position at a local non-profit organization. It's a good one. The directors and producers liked it, too, complimenting my choice as something that fit perfectly with their asthetic, even performing it exactly how they storytellers are trained to perform. "I'd have to do very little direction with you," I was told. So I left the room feeling happy about the work I had done.
But here's the crazy thing. The most interesting part of this whole audition, however, was going into it with the sure-fire knowledge that I didn't want the job. I hinted at this in the early part of the month, but I am no longer interested in being an actor. It's something that I always enjoyed, and something that I will most likely continue to do as a hobby, but I am no longer interested in trying to make my living at it.
I'm in the middle of a massive life-change, career-change, housing-change, everything-change that is leaving me an emotional wreck. But at the center of all of it is the absolute certainty that I'm steering my life in the direction I want to go. Sure, I look back now and then and wonder and lament. But that is my former life, and a new one awaits me. It scares me that I might not be able to have it right away, but I'm trying to have faith. So any good thoughts, prayers, good vibrations, etc. that you send me way will be greatly appreciated.